Be-Do-Have: A Conscious Way of Living Every Day

Say Goodbye to Have-Do-Be.

General Conventional Belief is that you first have to Get Stuff before you can Be Happy.

This takes action: getting all the qualifications, the career, plenty of money, the ideal body, the beautiful house and loving spouse (have), before you can be happy.

All this doing, this running around and busyness has led many of us into burnout.

I still remember the day that I had it all. After 15 years of hard slog getting through medical school and specialist training, I had landed myself a prestigious and well-paid job in a beautiful safe place. I was respected, I had an expanding bank account, a loving husband and a healthy baby boy.

One morning, sitting at my desk, reality ( or was it my soul?) hit me on the head with the weight of a sledge hammer.

“Is This It?“, I heard in my head, “ Is this really it??”

After so many years of striving , I now had it all. But then why wasn’t I being happy?

Why was I feeling empty inside? Where was the long awaited joy? My family and I lived in a beautiful house with a lush garden in the best area of town, I drove the bespoke new Jaguar but I wasn’t happy.

I felt death inside. What was I missing? I decided there and then to leave all my material property behind, leave my grateful patients and status as a vitreo retinal surgeon, my income, my home, my country and started searching all around the globe for the answer to one of the 4 fundamental questions.

Fundamental Question Number one: Who am I?

My husband and I, my one year old son and seven year old tomcat started on a quest to find happiness where we had last experienced it: in South Africa.

My hubby went back to his previous architect job and I decided to finally have some quality time with my firstborn son.  Instead of doing my job, I started being a mother and I loved it! I finally had some time to be present with my little boy.

How can YOU start BEING MORE and doing less?

1. Meditation( guided or not)
2. Just Be Stillness like described by Eckhard Tolle
3. Concentrating on your breathing will quiet the mind and bring you into being.
4. Count till 4 on the in breath and on the out breath, making them of the same length.
5. Then try to make both in-and exhalation longer by counting till 5, then 6…this is a very relaxing way of becoming present in the now.
6. Spend time in nature: see the molecules in the trees, feel the softness of the grass, smell the roses, touch a leave…
7. When waking up in the morning, decide who and what you want to be that day.

I went to work choosing to be happy this week. I had an exceptionally fun day singing and dancing to 80’s music in the procedure room.

“ Keep on singing, doctor”, said the anxious first-time patient, awaiting her intra ocular injection for the treatment of macular degeneration.” It makes me less scared.”

Be the Light and You will Spread the Light, wherever you go!

Dr V